| HOkay so this may be the last update for a while, not like i update this shit a lot anyway. let's see, here's some news for y'all.. me and david broke up saturday morning.. long story BUT i feel like talking about it anyway. so, on christmas i was down in woodstock at mike's house with david. william was there, my friend that has just gotten out of boot camp. welllll david didn't really like me talking to william that much anyway because me and him used to date back in the day. it's whatever. but that night william was REALLY fucked up & trying to hook up with me, following me around everywhere and shit, and trying to kiss me. well me and david got in a big fight about that even though i wasn't the one who did anything wrong; basically he just didn't want me talking to william anymore or even being friends with him. so i thought okay, i really really REALLY like david so it's cool. so we made up about that & everything was fine. well, this past weekend i was down in woodstock again and me and david were at mike's house again - i left there early and went back to david's house.. and someone that lives in the house told david that christmas night, i was the one trying to hook up with william & not the other way around. NOT TRUE. but david broke up with me the next morning because of that bullshit. anyway, david and william don't like each other. i talked to william and he told me that he's really sorry about all this and he'll tell david the truth about that night if he asks him about it. i tell david this and he's like okay.. but then says he's not gonna call him because he doesn't like him. UGH. you don't understand how aggrivated and upset i was. i had spent the past couple of days crying my eyes out over this boy who broke up with me basically for no reason, and he won't even ask william about it [ the guy that was all over ME that night ] even though william said he personally would tell david the truth. are you fucking kidding me? i mean, i really think maybe there are some other reasons why he doesn't wanna be with me anymore.. there has to be. why do boys have to be so damn stubborn? i wish for once there would be this one guy that was so close to perfect that made me SO happy [ all of these apply to david ] buutttt that could prove to me that all guys aren't the same. i really do. like, for the longest time i didn't have a boyfriend because i knew all the drama that follows having one.. i had a couple offers but wasn't interested, i hatteee drama. but then david comes along and he's this perfect little sweetheart who had supposedly treated one of his last girlfriends so good... and so i wanted to be with him really bad. and then he finally asked me to be his girlfriend and i was SO HAPPY.. after one of our first fights we had being together he told me that he could see himself falling in love with me & i wanted THAT to happen not this... because in all honesty, i WAS falling in love with him and i wanted to so bad because he made me the happiest i had been in a while. i loved everything about him. but i hate it how he is being so fucking stubborn.
my friend brett that is REALLY good friends with david texted me today and said "don't talk to david anymore, he's not worth it". when he said that i automatically thought that maybe david had started talking to someone else or something so i was like why, what happened? and brett goes "nothing i'm just telling you, you know if something were to happen i would of told you. i'm just saying because you're hurting yourself more and more over nothing... you gotta promise you'll stop worrying about david and stop trying to talk to him". i really thought about what he said and honestly it made me feel SO much better. especailly coming from someone who is best friends with david, and for him to tell me that he's not worth it. i was like wow... i really do love my friends. he was there for me cuz he knows how upset i was about it & what he said really did make me feel better. buttt anyway, if you're still reading this then i apologize because to tell you the truth, i'm just kinda heartbroken because i haven't had to deal with a breakup in a while and i don't know how to react to it.. i feel like i'm in like 9th grade or something but i really, honestly cared a lot about david & i still do. i mean.... this sucks.
on top of that i have to go down to woodstock this weekend because i have to get two of my things from david & i have one of his cds, can you say that is probably gonna be awkward. i really wanna see him but i'm not looking forward to it 1. because he won't wanna stick around and that'll hurt and 2. i'll probably just cry. i don't know what to do about all this & i'm just so confused with the whole situation... especially with the fact that i never did anything wrong in the first place. ahh, boys. fuck em all. britney spears is so right... can't live with em, can't live without em.
sorry that was so boring.. i just had to vent a little bit. i sorta feel better now that i got that off my chest. one last thing about that though.... I MISS MY BABY :( hold on to the one you love, cherish every single moment y'all have together because you are so lucky to have found what you have. don't take anything for granted because you never know what a good thing you had til it's gone...
anyway one last thing i wanna talk about though, so haha me and my sister and her roommate when to a MLK party on sunday, you had to dress like a gangsta haha. my outfit was amazing. i'll post a picture so you can see but i'll have to explain the rest of the outfit cuz you can't see it in the picture: baggy black sweatpants pulled down below my ass so you could see my bowers i was wearing that said "don't hate" across the ass and "player" across the front. it was SO MUCH fun.. & here's this for irony - a cop came to the door cuz apparently we were being loud.. a black woman cop, and we're all wearing bandanas on our head, bandaids on our cheek, long chains and baggy clothes and we look like straight up wiggers hahah.. it was priceless. anyway yeah that's about it, take care everybody xo
^ my sister & me
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